Diff for "Upsidaisium"

The Preposterosity Institute measures the preposterosity of ideas. We have determined that the preposterosity of the space elevator is far less than 500 milliHubbards. Now you can confidently correct those who tell you that disparage it. As an example of true preposterosity, I will present the Upsidaisium Space Elevator, an idea with a measured preposterosity of 985 milliHubbards.

Russian youth read about art and science from the Komsumolskaya Pravda. Americans watched cartoons, such as the Rocky and Bullwinkle show, where we learned about time travel, lunatic inventions, and the cold war.

A few months after Yuri Artsutanov described the Space Elevator in Komsumolskaya, we learned about Upsidaisium on Rocky and Bullwinkle. This is a magic material with negative weight. This can be used for antigravity applications, but primary use is explaining scientific results that do not match theoretical expectations.

Meanwhile, the Pottsylvania steel works achieved only 27% of their 5 year plan quota. Doctors Boris Badenov, Natasha Fatale, and Fearless Leader of the Pottsylvania Metallurgical Institute published an explanation based on Upsidaisium.

Although Doctors Badenov and Leader were executed for this paper, Doctor Fatale lived to isolate Upsidaisium and characterize it. It has an atomic number of 155, and a nucleus made of 233 up quarks and one down quark. This is extremely unstable, and the nucleus rapidly decays. However, all the quarks are emitted in precisely the same direction - up. This inspired Doctor Fatale to construct the first Upsidaisium space vehicle. Unfortunately, she put all the Upsidaisium on the bottom. This was a mistake. At forty thousand feet, the vehicle turned upside down, and she fell out.

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